February 2010
5 posts
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January 2010
16 posts
5 Jokes About The Apparent Eagerness Of Certain... →
jasontheexploder:
1. A Democratic congressman walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve your kind here.” The Democratic congressman whimpers, “You’re right, I’m sorry, I never should’ve come in here, it’s all my fault, boo-hoo, please, bend me over, I’ll do whatever you want because I’m a little punk.” The bartender says, “Jesus Christ, you people are pathetic.”
2....
Man opens bag of Cheese Rings, finds one →
bj-cg:
actiontransaction:
You have got to be fucking kidding me. I’m moving here if this is a big enough story to be covered.
“Man failed to mention that he owns a bag resealer and passed out between the time he bought the bag and when he notified authorities of the single cheese ring. Man being fined for sleep eating.”
Whoops
eklittleblog:
I am starting a new job early February and because the company has left me feeling uncertain about the security of the position I decided to apply to positions online, between working at Greg Kadel, and seeing what happens. Of course I never figured on an old co-worker (and personal friend of mine) receiving my resume. I also knew well before I applied for this one particular job...
My brother just moved to Israel and this is what...
aspiringslacker:
hey noah. i got a text from a random number asking if you had a brown north face. so if you do will you let me know so we can bring it by the pig and chick. that would be wonderful. So how is israel? i know you have only been there one day but still. Do you feel connected to the other fellow jews? are you more religious then yesturday? are you coming to become hassidic? When you...
My brother just moved to Israel and this is what...
aspiringslacker:
hey noah. i got a text from a random number asking if you had a brown north face. so if you do will you let me know so we can bring it by the pig and chick. that would be wonderful. So how is israel? i know you have only been there one day but still. Do you feel connected to the other fellow jews? are you more religious then yesturday? are you coming to become hassidic? When you...
December 2009
22 posts
It's not that she tried to kill him, she was just...
ricky: do oyu think if it was claire and not you, your mother migth have actually committed murder on me?
me: well i don't know, bc my mom pretty much listens to claire 100%, so if claire said no mom would listen
ricky: did you try and say no when your mom tried to kill me?
me: i was WITH YOU. The odds were high i'd be killed right along with you
ricky: not really. Your mom isnt dumb. She knew what she was doing when she made us hold onto that trailer.
me: yeah
Ricky: it's weird that i can remember that, but i have no recollection of 8 weeks we apparently spent basically living together
In which I confess
I confess that I thought I would try this blog thing because I needed something to do at work. I really tried to stick with it for a while and then i found myself shamelessly reblooging other people. well, thats just the way it has to be - thanks Lauren for explaining memes and locats to me. It’s a confusing, scary world and I am doing the Best I can.
“Basil lay back on the divan and watched her with fascination. This was how he...”
– Evelyn Waugh, Put Out More Flags (1942)
(via libraryland)
reblog with the first CD you ever bought
acewepeel:
ginarose:
stephenjames:
Third Eye Blind - “Self Titled”
Tracy Chapman was my first cassette (Crossroads, given to me by my father)
and “Best of… the Beatles” was my first CD, purchased in 4th grade
It was one of these:
The Beatles - “Please Please Me” Chumbawamba - “Tubthumping” Jock Jams Weird Al - “Bad Hair Day” Third Eye Blind - Self Titled
Michael JAckson...
Best Anthropolgical Breakdown of the Jersey Shore? →
sparkleneelysparkle:
Goes to that dude Brian who took over for Richard Lawson at Gawker. Its long. But if you can focus for more than 10 minutes, its worth it. I can’t. Also i miss richard.
There are the creatures that we are forced to ponder. Of course, there are a few words that one must know to understand their sophisticated patois:
Classy: This is a standard of beauty and behavior to...
A Bird in the Hand...
me: if you want,
you can just go out and get me a subway sandwich while i watch porn
Erika: dude im watching food porn
cant you see im invisible
leave me with my meaty duck confit
“If you’re going to tell people the truth, be funny or they’ll kill you.”
– Billy Wilder (via totallymorgan)
November 2009
77 posts
copycats:
Time After Time by Boyz II Men...
betterversionofme:
...
“Here is a lesson in creative writing. First rule: Do not use semicolons. They...”
– Kurt Vonnegut (A Man without a Country)
*[This is so untrue, but I still love this quote.]
(via wordplaydre)
(via libraryland)
